Stories & Other Things Holy

What Happens After We Die? A Heartfelt Story About the Mystery of Love

• Terry Nelson-Johnson and Joshua Minden • Season 1 • Episode 31

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What Happens After We Die? A Heartfelt Story About the Mystery of Love

When we lose someone we love, we're often left with the haunting question: "Where are they now?" In this deeply moving episode of Stories and Other Things Holy, Terry shares his journey from complex theological questions to beautifully simple truth.

đź“– CHAPTER MARKERS: 00:00 - Introduction: The Power of Simple Spirituality 01:14 - Kate Braestrup's Memoir: A Line That Changed Everything
02:16 - Becoming an Orphan: The Universal Question 03:49 - 3AM Questions and NPR Sundays 05:22 - The Moment Everything Became Clear 06:30 - Where Love Lives: Visiting Our Departed 07:36 - Closing Reflection

đź’­ REFLECTION QUESTIONS:

  • How do you find comfort when grieving the loss of loved ones?
  • What does "God is love, literally" mean to you?
  • How has your spirituality become simpler over time?

📚 MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:

  • "Zapped" by Kate Braestrup
  • Krista Tippett's "On Being" (NPR)

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Stories and Other Things Holy. Man, I love how much I love saying that, and I particularly love saying it today. So to set the story up, I need to tell you that I read this book there If You Need Me, by Kate Srap, and I'm partial to memoirs, and it was a memoir. And the gist of the story is she loses her husband tragically, who is a state patrol person. And in her, she's in her thirties, forties, two or three kids. It's a tough go of it. And he had determined that he wanted to go to the seminary, which she thought was odd, but was going to support it. And then he dies and somehow she thinks, well, maybe I should go to the seminary. And so she does and becomes the chaplain of the state forest group in New Hampshire someplace in the northeast. Anyway, she's a great storyteller. It's a beautiful book. And at some point in the book, she has this line, and the line is I find my spirituality becoming simpler and simpler. God is love, literally exclamation point. I read the line, I highlight the line with my little yellow highlighter, and I rewrite the line verbatim in the margin of the book after I asterisk, those of you who know me like this is happening. I just fell in love with the line. I find my spirituality becoming simpler and simpler. God is love, literally is beautiful. So fast forward, I don't know, maybe three or four years, and my mom, who I've spoken about a number of times here was in hospice for 18 months. She kept flunking hospice. She would die. She would almost die, and then resurrect. I'm like, mom, you have to actually die and then resurrect, or you're going to lose your spot in office. So 18 But then we got to the point where my mom appeared to be cooperating with hospice and got to the verge of dying, and then she died. Those of you for whom both your parents have died, that experience of becoming an orphan, in my case, I don't know, I was in my forties, late forties or something. It doesn't matter how old you are when you become an orphan, it is significant. And those of you who have witnessed someone you love entering into the ambiguous certain arms of love, I can't imagine that. Not alone, that I am alone in asking the question, where are they? Such a powerful question. And I was asking that in the wake of my mom's death, and I didn't want a lot of platitudes. Oh, she's on the pier with Uncle Bob laughing and playing guitar, okay? And I didn't want to take that from my siblings, sort of where they went, but for some reason I'm like, no, I don't know if there's a peer there. And I don't know. And I just kept asking.

It was mostly like a 3:

00 AM Ask those of you who have been up at 3:00 AM has nothing to do with indigestion, has something to do with your soul and your visceral parts. Where is my mom? And I was not then. I was a sort of a professional religious guy of all people that should have an answer to that question. You would think it would be me. Didn't have it. Very disconcerting. I was a devotee of Krista Tippett who had two shows about faith, something about faith, and then On Being, and she was brilliant, and I still have a great deal of regard for her. Did podcasts, so she's a colleague, I guess. Anyway, she would interview people and I didn't know podcasts from nothing. So in order to hear her interview, I had to listen to it live when it was on NPR in Chicago,

which was at five or 6:

00 AM on Sunday mornings. So I would naturally wake up, and then I had a little transistor radio with the little earpiece, and I would put the earpiece in and I would listen to Krista Tipt and I would fall asleep and wake up, fall asleep. So this particular Sunday morning, while I'm asking, I probably was falling asleep more because I was asking at 3:00 AM Where's my mom? I wake up in order to hear Krista Tippett introduce Kate Burt Trapp. And I'm like, oh my gosh, Kate burst trapp. And then I fell asleep and woke up, fell asleep, and I woke up just in time to hear Krista Tippet say, I was intrigued by one line from your book. I'm like, I hope it's my line. She says, yeah, the one that says, I find my spirituality. And could you finish it for us, Kate? Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. I find my spirituality becomes simpler and simpler. God is love, literally. And then I knew where my mom was. It was so clear to me. It was so simple. All really simple things. You need to run up to them through the complexities of it all. So I was asking all these questions about my mom, and then I'm like, wait, wait, wait. My mom is in love. And as I understand it this Sunday, bear with me. Those of you who are catholicy people, now somebody out there is with me, assumption or ascension, and who's going where? Are there anybody like Jesus, Mary? I don't know. They're doing something. And then one of them is, I dunno, and I'm like a professional Catholic, I don't know, assumption from assumption ascension. And anyway, please forgive me, but I know where my mom is, and I know anyone who is assumed by God, anybody who ascends into God is in love, literally. And when I want to visit my mom, I was so sad. I wanted to go visit her. And I knew the cemetery wasn't the place I wanted to go, but I didn't know where to go. I had all these memories of her, but they were all historical. What if I wanted to be with my mom? What would I ever do? And now, ever since that Krista Tippet episode, my confidence in where my mom is, is so strong. Like, oh, where's your mom? Oh, she's in love. And if I want to be with my mom, hang with my mom, converse with my mom. I need only risk entering into love. So I celebrate the assumption, whatever that is, and the ascension and God's place in both, and God's invitation to us to assume and to ascend into love and join my mom and all of those who you love, who reside in love, literally. Stories and Other Things Holy. Bless us, Oh Lord, for these gifts which we continually receive from thy bounty, through Christ our Lord. Thank you everyone.

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